You’ve made it through the early days of sickness and nausea, the blessed second trimester where your lovely neat bump appears but you still feel nice and spritely, and into the third and final trimester when things start to get tougher. Then comes the final month- you’re super excited to be getting close to meeting your baby, but let’s face it, it’s not all glam….
1. Getting to your due date is the slowest process known to man (well, woman) as the month somehow has 3639 days in it.
2. You’re so uncomfortable, but you’re too big and tired to spend energy trying to get more comfortable. It wouldn’t help anyway.
3. You dream about being able to sleep for more than a few hours without having to pee. If you’re a first timer you naively dream that it will be better once baby just hurries up and arrives. Subsequent times you know it’s only going to get worse and at least you can chose when to pee at the moment!
4. You’re fed up of not only having a big pregnant belly, but big pregnant face, and arms, and feet, and hands…
5. Speaking of big pregnant feet and hands – you’re sick of being swollen and trying to sit in a way that you can drain those cankles a bit whilst not squashing your ever growing bump.
6. Heartburn can just do one! It started out that certain foods caused heartburn, now it’s all food, eating too late at night, not eating enough, getting hungry, water…
7. You’re nesting like a crazy woman- scrubbing your kitchen and bathroom at every possible moment. But your bump sticks out so far you end up contorted into ridiculous positions and end up crippled before you get finished.
8. If you already have a toddler (or more) they have no concept of your current state. Sure, they’ll say cute things about the baby and kiss your bump, but they’ll follow it by climbing you and kneeing the bump, running off so you have to chase them, and demanding snacks when you just want. to. sit. still.
9. You have to pee all the time. Which means dragging your big pregnant butt off the sofa every time you get remotely comfortable. Then as soon as you’ve peed, baby will wait ’til you’re back to whatever you were doing/ just climbing into the car to stomp on your bladder so you have to run back to the loo again. 3 drips will come out.
10. Your head flits between being prepared to do anything to get baby out, to being terrified of having to push an actual baby out…
….You’re nearly there, good luck!!